A walk in the rain

Under a colorful umbrella

I walked with her,

Smiling, hiding my nervousness.

Her smile enchanting me more,

Her laugh sounding musical,

We walked in the rain, 

Under a colorful umbrella.

The rain was falling softly,

The sky was gray

The wind was blowing gently,

Swaying the leaves to and fro. 

An ideal romantic scene.

Yet, we weren't holding hands.

Nor we were kissing under the umbrella.

Why didn't we make our  moment a memorable one?

Sadly, her heart has no space for me.

She said she's confused about me.

Why didn't I kiss and hold her hand?

Am I a coward or a decent one?

Would she have blushed or slapped me,

If I did kiss he?

That only she knows.

A thought on existence

I was born long ago

And will be dead soon enough, 

Was I born, just to die?

Surely, It can't be that absurd.

My existence, yours too, must have a purpose.

Then what is the reason of my existence?

I still don't know.

Yet, I don't want to know.

I just want to live

As my existence can't be just to survive.

Then is it also to love and be loved?

I believe so,

I have loved and  be loved,

Found and lost,

Accepted and abandoned.

Laughed and cried.

But what is life without love?

An existence without love, a real tragedy.

Don't mock me rain.

Oh! Rain, are you mocking me?

Or are you consoling me?

You came early but also a little late,

She was gone already.

There is no wound in my heart

So, don't try to soothe anything.

There is no sense of lost in me

You don't need to mock me.

I've loved her, not knowing what is love.

She is gone and I am lost.

Beautiful memories, all I have left with.

I don't mind the  pain of reliving them.

I am a hypocrite

Hypocrite, yes I am that.

I think something but say something else.

I have a principle of my own,

And it does have a limit.

When it works against my benefit

I let it go, easily sometimes, 

sometimes with a heavy heart.

I am scared of others judgement,

What to do?

I want peace not grudge.

I say what they want to hear

And suppress my opinion within me,

Forever banishing it,

To a remote corner of my brain.